Marriage is an act of joining a man and a woman in a bond that is meant to last until death, but if handled improperly, can lead to separation or divorce. Marriage is significantly more than a civil contract with legal benefits. It is part of God’s plan for a man to leave his parents and cleave to his wife, so she can have children and fill the earth.
The main purpose of Marriage is to make both couples happy, but as we see it today, it also brings challenges, usually big ones that are caused by greed. How a couple deals with problems often determines whether their relationship falls apart or stays strong.
Marriages require a great effort of commitment and sacrifice. The thought of committing your life to another person can be a daunting one, especially if you don’t have a lot of experience with relationships. It’s hard to imagine that you and your spouse won’t live happily ever after, after all the excitement about your wedding. Many modern-day marriages cannot last because neither couple has done enough to make the marriage work.
This brings me to my topic of discussion. What do couples need to do in order for their marriage to succeed? Here are 7 things that every newly wedded couple should do right away to make their marriage work:
Start acting more like a married couple
The first few months of your marriage may be challenging, particularly if you are trying to adjust to life as a married couple. So many married couples have refused to accept the fact that they are now married and that marriage comes with a lot of responsibility. This behaviour is very common with men who are reluctant to let go of old habits, such as frequently going out with friends at night or making themselves available to other women. This behaviour may indicate that you are still trying to hold on to old habits. Marriage is a bond between two people of the opposite sex, which means they become one in that process. When you get married, you must leave all former habits behind and start a new life with your wife. Your wife is a part of you and apart from your mother, she is the only woman that matters. Can you imagine a situation where you would go outside without any clothes? It is critical to approach your marriage with the same care you apply to your clothing. This reasoning implies that you are both inseparable and, as a result, she must feature in your thought and decision-making. This advice is not specific to men, but also applies to women. Both of you are part of a team, and you need to start acting like one by abandoning old habits.
Let go of some of your friends who are not on the same page with you
We all have friends who are unable to restrain themselves from being the life of the party. They attach great importance to having fun, especially during the weekends. To them, the only way to have fun is to go to a club, and because of this, they make you part of their frivolous lifestyle. If you are married and have friends of that kind, it is time to let go of them. Knowing that you are married and allowing friends of that nature into your life will only mislead you into believing that you are still single. We are all aware of how that always turns out. As a married couple, you have no business with friends who will be inviting you out frequently, forgetting that your main responsibility is your partner at home. You should only consider such an invitation if you are willing to bring your partner along? Why are you intent on entertaining friends who are unaware that you are married? I’m not saying you shouldn’t spend time with your friends as a married person, but it would be better if you did it during the day rather than at night. Your marriage is bound to work the moment you start choosing the type of people you allow into your life, rather than the other way around.
Learn to collaborate and share responsibilities
As I previously stated, marriage brings with it a slew of new responsibilities, and one of the leading reasons why so many marriages fail is because some women refuse to be proper support to their husbands. Some even attempt to avoid sharing financial responsibility by thinking that their husband’s money should exclusively be used for paying the whole bills, forgetting that marriage is a partnership between man and woman. I am aware that it is a man’s duty to take care of his family. If a woman decides to be a housewife, then it’s her husband’s responsibility to take care of her, but if she has a job, she can still support him. If your husband is responsible for at least 70% of the house’s expenses, then why not pay the rest? The Most High God created women to be helpers, but he didn’t say what type of help they would provide. Using common sense, we can only think that the word “helper” would mean helping your husband in areas where he may struggle. There are times when men struggle greatly, but due to shame, they are unable to express their feelings. Your husband might not want to admit this, but deep inside him, he would be more proud of you if you became a better helper to him.
Make Better plans for your future
This is another important consideration that many couples forget to consider from the very beginning of their wedding planning. Life after marriage will turn out to be a lot more expensive than the wedding itself. There are numerous things that will cost money after marriage, and one of them is the introduction of a child. Couples have a hard time at the beginning of their marriages because they don’t plan properly before having a baby. Plan your finances well so that you give things that matter the priority they deserve as time goes by. To purchase a house, you must have a plan. If you are interested in having children, then you must also plan a better future for the sake of your children. It is significant not to put yourself in situations that could throw your marriage into financial chaos and potentially a divorce.
Endeavour to spend time with each other
So many marriages are failing in this current generation because couples are failing to spend time with one another. The world is so imbalanced that most jobs today don’t give married couples the opportunity to spend time together. It seems like the world’s system is set up to make you work so hard that you end up breaking down so that you’ll lose the desire to relate to your partner more. It is, of course, easier said than done, but I would encourage you to find time in your busy schedule to spend with your partner. This is why I am opposed to having too many friends while you are married, as it will take your attention away from your partner. When you spend time with your partner, you’ll become closer and more in love with each other. This will help prevent you from getting bored with each other. Your wife is the perfect person to spend time with because not only does she bring with her numerous other benefits, but she also brings with her, true friendship.
Learn the act of forgiveness
A big reason why there is a high divorce rate in our society is that plenty of couples do not know how to forgive each other and let go of issues that affect them. When two couples get too sensitive, a little misunderstanding can lead to a big fight, and no one is willing to say they’re sorry. It is frustrating when everyone is always right, and this behaviour has ruined many marriages. What happened to the saying “for better, for worse” on the day of marriage? Why aren’t couples acting on their vows? A successful marriage will require someone to step in and calm the storms during an argument. Forgiveness may be a difficult task to undertake, but if you want your marriage to last, somebody between you two needs to learn the act of forgiveness.
Keep your marriage in your prayers
Regardless of what your beliefs are, I believe in God Almighty in heaven and that is my opinion, even if many people might be too sensitive about it. I have witnessed how prayers can help sustain marriage. A couple that includes God in their marriage will surely benefit because it is God who sets you up to meet your soul mate, and it is his will that nothing bad can happen to your marriage. God never intended for any man or woman to suffer. We are only experiencing hardship in our current circumstances because of our selfishness and lawlessness. Let me put this test to you. Why not start praying for your marriage? If you don’t see any progress within a month, you can stop believing in him again or, even better, just ignore my articles. As Always, it’s my opinion.